The All Too Tender Human Experience

Self-Portrait April 2023

Over the last 20 years I have transformed, as a person and as a healing practitioner, for what feels like life times. Every year there are new areas for growth and areas of complexity burgeoning through this incredible human journey we all share.

From an early age I knew that I wanted to capture the essence of this all too tender human experience somehow. Whether it was through keeping a dream journal in my teens, writing poetry in my twenties, becoming a yoga teacher and energy healer in my thirties, and eventually building my entrepreneurship as a healer and coach in recent years.

Like a snake sheds her skin, it seems I too move through life as a shapeshifter.
Always seeking the truth of renewal life is offering.

This renewal never comes easily. In fact, each time it feels more like a cosmic rebirth. Whereby my whole being is challenged and thrown about by the churning ocean that is the emotional upheaval that comes with bigger waves of expansion and contraction.

I know this phase all too well.  

When everything you have known before has faded into the backdrop of your past and you know deep down within your soul your life is asking something more of you. You approach the chaos and promise of a new beginning.  Yet again, finding yourself, at a tender, new and vital crossroads of self-inquiry. 

It is a moment when I know my work and I are choosing to go deep down and inward to give birth to something new.

You know this is clearly happening when all the previous methods of coping, working, writing, creating just aren’t quite measuring up to the new needs of the present moment reality. Questioning, self-inquiry and listening on a deeper level become the necessary focus again.

As some of you may know about 9 months ago I left New York after 25 years and moved to Chicago to be with my partner and his daughter full time. It is the biggest leap of faith in my life yet to date.

I never imagined I would move for love. Most of the things I did in my life were motivated by my career, not personal fulfillment. 

It is a misconception to believe that when you find the right partner, the right job or finally create what your heart has always longed for that all will be easier. This is simply not the case. Life just gets more REAL. And this is the good news.

It took me a long time to get comfortable with my true needs and desires for real connection. To eventually see how love, intimacy and partnership was what my soul moving me towards. To admit that I wasn’t fulfilled with what I had already created felt at first like defeat.

For the first half of my life, or shall I call it my previous life, I was so identified with being single and happy doing so. Relationships always seemed to just get in the way of what I wanted to create for myself in my life. I was resourced by solitude and lived simply to develop my work and honor my intense longing for spiritual connection.

Today as I write to you, everything is different. And I can see that everything that came before has prepared me for the present. I am no longer the person I was and I have yet to fully understand who I will become. For the first time in a long time I feel out of place. I do not know myself as I knew myself to be.

And it feels like a relief to say this out loud and be with the truth of it.

Time is so very precious and everyday looks different than before. I am different again. And even though I know myself well and lean into this level of self trust ever more deeply now, there are parts of myself that I have yet to meet and are urging me to pay attention.

This is a new time of inspiration and creation for me. 

One of the things that has surprised me so much is the need I have for solitude and stillness. It feeds and supports my writing practice. Writing that comes without force and can only be coaxed out of a true listening space.

Writing to me has always been the way I find myself when I feel untethered or lost. Writing to me is the sacred art of self-discovery. The art of recording the way spirit moves though one’s heart and mind. A flow of consciousness and care that can only be born through you as much as you will allow it.

And with these last astrological transits of Pluto moving into Aquarius it feels all too fitting for me to move more towards what is less conscious, yet all too potent to ignore. 

This weekend was a turning point. It was the first time in the last nine months I had all to myself. I felt deep down a new direction was trying to reach me and guide me through my questioning.

It has become clearer to me now that this inward pause I feel is really a strong desire to bring my writing forward in a deeper, more cohesive way. I love to create. And I can feel how the creative wave wants to go deeper than before.

To honor the call of our creative urge we must simply make the time (start doing and stop making excuses). In some ways I feel this is why The Well was born. A space to hold the promise of new creations from their most fragile beginnings to their fully embodied expression.

This is why I have decided to take some time for stillness and reflection on a larger scale than before. I will still be writing and seeing clients, but the focus will be on creating a more substantial work. Perhaps a book or collection of writings. 

If you wish to book a healing session you can do that directly here. Intuitive Readings will also be available here. And if you are seeking a deeper level of support on developing your own body of work through one of my 1:1 coaching programs please reach out and book a free consultation here.

Perhaps some of you will join me in The Well for support and community around your sacred writing time. 

It has been an incredible journey thus far with all of you. I hope you will stay tuned for the next iteration.

I look forward to reconnecting with you on the other side of this quest for deeper meaning and purpose through self-inquiry and creation.

All my love, always...

Andrea