When Things Go Off the Rails
Full Moon Total Lunar Eclipse, March 3rd 2026
I think the important thing to remember is that no matter how utterly messed up a situation is or how impossible it may feel there is always a necessary process underway.
Whether we like it or not.
When things go off the rails it usually gives us an opportunity to touch into a long held pattern (or collection of patterns) in our life that has a chance to let go and shift.
No matter how emotionally charged it is for you, in the end, you have a better choice in how you respond once you’ve unloaded the emotional layers.
We all have moments when a cool collected response is not available.
Reactions, rightly so, have their role in our interactions especially when it comes to being poked or prodded in some of our most tender places.
Sometimes you just need to hit a wall. Let yourself unburden. Your feelings matter. Acknowledge them.
Eventually, you will find that once the root is exposed there is a path back to who you are at your core.
What is real, true, and good for you becomes available and allows you to, once again, access your own source of clear direction.
When a complex, emotionally charged situation is hitting you, one of the most caring and self-compassionate things you can do is bring it into a conscious process. Whether it is with your energy healer, therapist, or coach, someone who can skillfully guide the process as you work though it feeling supported and seen is what begins the potential for relational healing.
When we can consciously observe ourselves as we “air out" our feelings, while feeling seen and held, we not only help alleviate overwhelm and stress, but our system can more readily digest the old pattern(s) while also creating space for new more compassionate choices to emerge.
When we are overwhelmed, we naturally fall into adaptive patterns like fight, flight, freeze, fawn. Whether we notice it right away or not, we can be stifling our emotions away, explaining them instead of feeling them, or judging ourselves too harshly for having them in the first place.
Healing through our relationships is not about control.
It is about whether or not we have the awareness to see we are stuck in an emotional pattern, understand how it is impacting us, and make a new and different (more conscious) choice.
When we feel safe enough to express our true feelings and are met in those moments with compassionate understanding we strengthen the ability to move from our reactions to a deeper level of responsiveness and clarity.
Healthier relating means we feel witnessed by another who sees us with kindness in a way maybe we’ve never experienced before. In healthier relating we are held through our emotional reactions and are able to navigate them while moving into greater openness about what we need. As we learn to be with our needs honestly with another we build a stronger more coherent sense of self and feel our wholeness and belonging with others more easily.
Coherence with our true self is what ultimately heals.
When we can give ourselves permission to have all the feelings, learn (as we feel them) what we actually need, and move into more self-honoring choices, repair in our relationships becomes not only possible, but an important part of our collective healing.
Repair in relationships is about clarity, kindness, and personal agency.
This eclipse was a tough one to be sure and every good eclipse no matter how harsh is made to push the things that need our attention to the surface.
May you go gently.
Yours for the journey,
Andrea
